“I deserve all the Nobel prizes in a most bigly way! Literature, Art Of The Deal is a masterpiece! Very good. Math and economics, I knew exactly how much to borrow from the Saudis! Frankly I’m very smart. Physics, medicine, who needs that woke crap? Bleach cures everything! I’m pretty sure I’m the greatest man who ever lived. All real Americans think the Nobel Prize should just be called the Trump Prize, believe me.”