• Allero@lemmy.today
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      8 months ago

      It is misandry to generalize and discriminate against men because “all men are dangerous scumbags” or something.

      Besides, it doesn’t help anyone, really, and fosters extra anxieties and aggression.

      We absolutely need cultural shift that would help everyone (both women and men) to expose rapists and any sort of harassment. We need to eliminate any cultural acceptability of those actions that remain.

      We do not need to propagate hate based on gender/sex.

      Absolute majority of men are perfectly normal human beings, like absolute majority of black people aren’t criminals, or absolute majority of gays are not child molesters or whatever the stereotypes were. Besides, all of those traits are immutable.

          • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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            8 months ago

            People might say that on the internet, but how many of those people have male SOs, or dads, or brothers? Could they be engaging in hyperbole?

            • Allero@lemmy.today
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              8 months ago

              Some women go as far as to reject any heterosexual relationships despite being attracted to men for precisely this reason, and they often come from bad families, so relationship with men in the family is also negative.

              Sure, most women are less radical, but even for them this constant hyperbole often sends anxiety levels to the moon, makes them unhealthily cautious, obsessed, in some cases paranoid.

              Many women who have never been abused or threatened (at least from what they say) in any serious way can develop fear and loathing of men simply by leaning into this narrative.

              And this seriously messes with very real relationships.

              And it’s not a case of “women stupid”, no. Men can and do absolutely fall for the similar traps, growing stereotypes about women and leaning into them. It’s a universal human trait, and the one we have to address.

    • xor@infosec.pub
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      8 months ago

      i didn’t say misandry is equivalent to racism, i said the exact same argument is used to justify racism.
      but there’s definitely a lot of overlap between prejudice based upon sex/gender vs prejudice based upon perceived race.

      and rape culture isn’t really a thing, it’s not a culture… it’s a problem but that’s the wrong word.
      there’s like, chinese culture and such… there’s no, like, People of the Rape… misogyny is an aspect of many cultures, but it’s not the culture itself and typically rape is extremely prohibited… and had the death penalty in most cultures throughout history…

      misandry is an understandable response but, ultimately it’s not leading towards any solution…

      • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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        8 months ago

        People use arguments to justify everything. Sometimes they’re right, sometimes they’re wrong. This is a stupid point.

        and rape culture isn’t really a thing, it’s not a culture… it’s a problem but that’s the wrong word.

        If you can’t be bothered to so much as type “what is rape culture” into google, I’m done talking to you

        • xor@infosec.pub
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          8 months ago

          let me just google that real quick:
          oh wow! i had noooo idea what you meant by that until i googled using a whole sentence instead of keywords like an idiot… wow, never heard that term before you used…

          yeah i know what is meant by it, and it’s a stupid term…
          car culture is a culture around cars,
          chinese culture is a culture around a people…
          there is no culture around raping…
          in most cultures, rape is seen as pretty bad.
          “rape culture” is a misnomer, it’s a stupid term. It is an invalid term no matter how many websites define it.

          People use arguments to justify everything. Sometimes they’re right, sometimes they’re wrong.

          and this may be the dumbest string of words i’ve ever seen put together.
          my point isn’t that they are both arguments, it’s that it’s the EXACT SAME argument, only substituting gender for race… and as such, equally as wrong.

          but, i do agree that it’s pointless trying to talk to someone like you

          • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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            8 months ago

            in most cultures, rape is seen as pretty bad.

            Yes, literally everyone agrees that rape is bad. The problem is that in our culture, we have a bad habit of rationalizing what we do as not really rape. How many times have you heard someone ask what a woman was wearing, or why she was walking home at night instead of driving, or why she was alone at a bar, or why she didn’t fight back, or why she didn’t report sexual violence as soon as it happened? Why does nearly every woman have at least one experience with sexual violence? Why did we elect a guy who openly admitted to sexual assault as president? It’s almost like we have a culture around enabling and forgiving rape, in large part by rationalizing it as “not really” rape. I wonder if there’s a word for a culture that enables sexual violence.

            • xor@infosec.pub
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              8 months ago

              How many times have you heard someone ask what a woman was wearing,

              never

              or why she was walking home at night instead of driving,

              never

              or why she was alone at a bar, or why she didn’t fight back, or why she didn’t report sexual violence as soon as it happened?

              never, this is 2024 and all your points are from 1970…

              Why does nearly every woman have at least one experience with sexual violence?

              also not true

              Why did we elect a guy who openly admitted to sexual assault as president?

              most of us didn’t elect him, most of the country was outraged by this, and although he has sexually assaulted women for real, the way he said it was framed as joking… and a lot of people accepted it as just a joke (it turned out he was actually bragging…)

              It’s almost like we have a culture around enabling and forgiving rape, in large part by rationalizing it as “not really” rape.

              except it’s not. And even if all your points weren’t insane distortions, it’s still not a culture around rape, it has been a terrible aspect of our culture in the past, but we’ve improved drastically, and continue to improve.

              trying to say it’s “rape culture” is intellectually lazy and actually destructive in that it hamstrings any attempt at reasonable discussion… so essentially, you’re enabling rape by trying to make it about “all men” and redefining all culture as “rape culture”…

              • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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                8 months ago

                the way he said it was framed as joking… and a lot of people accepted it as just a joke (it turned out he was actually bragging…)

                YOU HAVE JUST DESCRIBED RAPE CULTURE.

                • xor@infosec.pub
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                  8 months ago

                  writing in all capital letters does not make a coherent argument.
                  in fact, the exact opposite.
                  btw, he was joking that as a celebrity, all women are automatically consenting to his gropes… not that as a celebrity he can sexually assault women…
                  you have to be famous to grope someone

                  I DID NOT JUST DESCRIBE RAPE CULTURE YOU MORON