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Transcript: A girl is standing in front of a trans flag. She is wearing a sweater with the trans flag colors and has cat ears. A caption above the image reads: “React with the sparkling heart emoji if you love girl bulge, or hate late stage capitalist imperialism”.

  • Makeshift@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    Isn’t it really insensitive to point out a trans girls’ penis? Like I can only imagine having transitioned successfully in every other way, feeling almost completely comfortable with your body… but then someone sees your bulge and just has to remind you of your balls and triggering dysmorphic feelings. Rude much?

    While I’m in questioning rant mode: What’s with the thing of calling people trans+gender in the first place? Is a trans girl not allowed to just be a girl?

    I’m sure many people have good intentions, but it really feels like accidental mean behavior to spotlight something that should be between partners, doctors, and close friends/family who can be trusted keep reminding someone they were born into a body that felt wrong.

    Pardon my rant. Just confused/frustrated at some things.

    • WillStealYourUsername@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      4 months ago

      Q: Isn’t it really insensitive to point out a trans girls’ penis?

      A: Depends on the person. Every trans person has different dysphorias.

      Q: What’s with the thing of calling people trans+gender in the first place?

      A: When done right it’s only done where needed for context.

      Q: I’m sure many people have good intentions, but it really feels like accidental mean behavior to spotlight something that should be between partners, doctors, and close friends/family who can be trusted keep reminding someone they were born into a body that felt wrong.

      A: Many trans people (including myself) like the kind of humor in the meme (it’s a meme, and not to be taken seriously). There is a clear difference between pointing out someones “bulge” irl and in this meme. Additionally, referencing someones genitals again is triggering for some and not at all for others, it’s not always a secret or whatever.

      There’s another community here on blåhaj this could have been posted to instead where it might have been a better fit, but the reference to a bulge is not the point of the meme and is supposed to be somewhat empowering. Tucking and other practices are common for transfems (and some eventually do surgery), but some don’t. Some people view attitudes like this as a way to break down gender stereotypes and be non-conforming, thinking they should be allowed to be this or that gender regardless of what bits they have.

      EDIT: Also I should add you can be trans without dysphoria.

    • lone_faerie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      I’m a trans girl and love my girl bulge. There’s plenty of trans girls who do and plenty who don’t. I think it also plays into your next question, trans girls should absolutely be allowed to just be a girl. Trans is just an adjective, like tall or blonde. In an ideal world, pointing out a girl’s penis would be no different than pointing out her height.

    • riwo@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      its definitely pretty weird and kinda (sexually) harassy to point out someones bulge in public, especially if you dont know them well and have that kind of relationship where that might be possible

      but spreading positivity on the internet about genitals that ppl might be dysphoric about, is imo good. we all profit from normalising our bodies. even if we cant accept ourselves, its good to know that others will love us either way

    • theneverfox@pawb.social
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      4 months ago

      Let’s put it another way. If you’re a trans-girl with a bulge, that’s your gender. That’s part of your identity

      You’re a trans-girl - a subcategory of girl, and from there a sub-category of trans girl. Gender is a nebulous concept, there is no perfect form of any gender

      You can’t line up a bunch of girls against a wall and arrange them by how much of a girl they are

      Our brains are wired to categorize to take short cuts - but people don’t fit nearly in boxes

      Getting less philosophical, for some people that might be a huge trigger, for others it’s just a trait. And if it’s just a trait…well people like being desirable, and people don’t generally appreciate traits of themselves they’ve accepted as part of them being tiptoed around like a taboo

    • pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      I mean, if you’re making a comment directed at me/a specific person, absolutely. However, personally, I think this post is fine. Context matters too, this isn’t denigrating or negative so it doesn’t bother me along those lines either. I don’t particularly care for this post, but I wouldn’t call it a problem. And yes, we already call trans women women, and clarify trans when it’s contextually relevant. For example, “Women find this offensive” vs “Trans women find this offensive”, the latter is addressing the sub group specifically. I don’t mean to jump down your throat and prefer to err on the side of not potentially bothering people, just thought I’d chime in with my two cents

    • violetraven@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      I used to be impartial to mine, almost wanted both (eg penile preservation vaginoplasty), but lately I just want it gone. I may have liked my bulge at some point, but the harassment and death threats make it a very tenuous living situation.