Yeah, I didn’t bother looking up the current guy’s name because Balmer is funnier.

Well send Balmer to your house with a box of cookies! (Disclaimer: box may be empty depending on length of trip)

He was asking for it!

I read it as “generals” the first time, but after reading these comments, now I only read “genitals” when I glance at the headline.

https://archive.is/ktNni

Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy!

Was he calling it “lube”?

Okay, that does make more sense.

She’s probably supposed to be raking the forest to prevent forest fires.

I read somewhere that he made a few million on them. It blew me away. It does not compute.

This just feels wrong to me. Sometimes I forget how old I am and then something like this happens.

Oh god damn it, you totally got me!

They both went viral somewhat recently. I think that’s the joke, Burns is so old and out of touch he mixed them up.

I had the same thought. It should be:

Won a golf game and they didn’t see me cheat?

Or maybe:

Won a golf game and they were too intimidated to complain when they saw me cheat?

Brain worms: The gift that keeps on giving!

That’s pretty funny, I never thought there’d be multiple universities using the state’s name!

I’m not from the states, why is the “The” important?

Travis, get your gun!

He’s going to need to be in a wheelchair

He’s never liked exercise, just like many of his fellow Americans. Man of the people!

drooling

He’s got someone to wipe up the drool, that’s job creation!

and unable to talk

He’s the strong, silent type!

before anyone in the right concedes that there may be an issue.

I don’t know if this will happen, unless he loses too many elections (??) and they suddenly drop him like a sack of hammers.

Ah! That’s the missing piece, thank you!