What in the orphan crushing machine is this shit?!
https://maritime-executive.com/article/bananas-ahoy-as-overboard-containers-wash-ashore
“The guards were on the river bank to make sure the poor didn’t take the fruit from the river, when that was too expensive it was collected in a pile and doused in kerosene. The hogs were burned as well all for the sake of profit” -grapes of wrath
I honestly think about it to this day. We didn’t give milk to the homeless during covid. Farmers dumped it all for profit. We don’t grow food to feed We gro food to make profit.
Came to the comments just to make sure that passage was on top.
Great job you figured out capitalism sucks
So the rumors are true, good food is indeed illegal in the UK.
Yeah but it’s also the daily mail who are reporting this so default assumptions.
One joke
There are more actually. Interested?
yes
In their defense, the warning could just be a CYA thing if someone eats one, gets sick and wants to sue for food poisoning.
That’d make sense, but they didn’t warn about the possible consequences; they warn that you may be prosecuted
Because they have lawyers in retainer. They only speak one language. From their perspective, putting out a threading notice is the cheapest, easiest thing to do.
Excuse me. There’s a sign at Ramsett Park that says “Do not drink the sprinkler water,” so I made sun tea with it, and now I have an infection. Sir? Sir, are… are… are… are you listening to me, sir? Sir, I’m talking to you! Sir! Sir, are you aware that there is waste in your water system?
That’s probably the case, or at least a part of it, but it’s crazy that it’s gotten to that point. If somebody finds a food item in the wild and decides to eat it, the consequences should be 100% on them. It doesn’t even have to apply to food, either.
If I find a block heater on the ground, install it into my car, and then my car catches fire; I’m not going to go after the manufacturer of the block heater. I’m the idiot who decided to do something stupid.
That being said there’s real life cases which indicate that yes, people are stupid and will sue over their own stupidity, so I’m not surprised at all.
What if you eat the block heater?
Believe it or not, straight to jail.
Dailymail is not a reputable source.
Got a loicense for that banana, mate?
I could’ve sworn the Australian word for banana was bendigo bendy…
Fruity boomerang.
Fruit-shaped union dispute
yes, and for my pet louse
I picture you walking your tame giant isopod hunting for beach bananas…
eric loves the beach
It’s “moit”, moit!
Prosecuted for what? Enjoying a meal? A succulent, banana meal?
Are they going to fight? I bet they know their judo well!
This is democracy manifest.
Get your hands off my penis, SIR!
The works of the roots of the vines, of the trees, must be destroyed to keep up the price, and this is the saddest, bitterest thing of all. Carloads of oranges dumped on the ground. The people came for miles to take the fruit, but this could not be. How would they buy oranges at twenty cents a dozen if they could drive out and pick them up? And men with hoses squirt kerosene on the oranges, and they are angry at the crime, angry at the people who have come to take the fruit. A million people hungry, needing the fruit- and kerosene sprayed over the golden mountains. And the smell of rot fills the country. Burn coffee for fuel in the ships. Burn corn to keep warm, it makes a hot fire. Dump potatoes in the rivers and place guards along the banks to keep the hungry people from fishing them out. Slaughter the pigs and bury them, and let the putrescence drip down into the earth.
There is a crime here that goes beyond denunciation. There is a sorrow here that weeping cannot symbolize. There is a failure here that topples all our success. The fertile earth, the straight tree rows, the sturdy trunks, and the ripe fruit. And children dying of pellagra must die because a profit cannot be taken from an orange. And coroners must fill in the certificate- died of malnutrition- because the food must rot, must be forced to rot. The people come with nets to fish for potatoes in the river, and the guards hold them back; they come in rattling cars to get the dumped oranges, but the kerosene is sprayed. And they stand still and watch the potatoes float by, listen to the screaming pigs being killed in a ditch and covered with quick-lime, watch the mountains of oranges slop down to a putrefying ooze; and in the eyes of the people there is the failure; and in the eyes of the hungry there is a growing wrath. In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage.
I never read the grapes of wrath, but I should.
Please do. It’s an amazing piece of art.
It took depressingly long for this to be posted
This is to keep people safe. Only those that have taken the Banana Self Defense class are certified for consumption of these bananas.
I don’t know anything about British courts, but I doubt that any court is going to find anybody guilty of any major crime for collecting bananas washing up on the beach, for which the corporation that lost them got an insurance settlement to cover the loss. That’s salvage, and salvage rights are long established.
While the coastguard was clear that they didn’t mean the bananas
this does not include perishable goods like foodstuffs.
everyone here IS following maritime salvage law.
The “long established” rule is: the owner has all rights to the cargo and wreck, but must compensate those who assist in recovery only if the owner agrees to assistance
The British maritime law that keeps getting referenced here was put into place initially to ensure that people would be compensated completely when assisting.
Previously, when it was a raw ‘handshake’ agreement, there would be negotiations before helping which delayed assistance, or Party A would screw over Party B with a low-ball reward, or Party B would just nope out of the situation for fear of not getting reimbursed and risk of damaging their own property.
The shipping company in this situation asked for assistance and sent a list of missing stuff, especially since they were threatened with penalties for creating a hazardous waterway. If you find missing stuff, you report it, and the government knows already how much you should be compensated and makes sure you get it. In this case, the company wants their expensive refrigeration equipment.
I have no idea if they offer a reasonable amount, but this was the intent.
I’ve seen Oliver twist, they are ready to sentence people to jail for this crime.
I mean, that was slightly fictional, although that’s the maybe the joke. And set a sesquicentury ago.
That’s a big word. You need some reedumacation
Yeah, I futzed with it a bit. At first I did sesquicentennial, but that’s purely an adjective which isn’t great. Sesquicentenary refers to the day, so that wouldn’t work. So, I made a nonce word which, if you know these other two, is clear.
I’ll just ignore the insulting tone.
Eating beach bananas sounds like a great way to get some kind of weird illness. It’s not like there’s a nearby banana tree that they could have come from. But maybe I’m just too accustomed to grocery stores
Definitely peel it first.
Would you eat a banana out of the toilet, as long as you peeled it first?
Yes, without hesitation, although I’d want to rinse it first to avoid cross-contamination.
Banana picking and shipping as it usually happens isn’t exactly sterile, either. Or the grocery store where everyone is sorting through them. This is also why you should wash anything you don’t peel.
Who’s toilet?
You’re toilet.
Yeah, some ppl would pay extra depending on whose toilet
I would just assume that through osmosis those bananas ate salty as fuck, plus I have seen the size of the fucking spiders on some of those bananas being shipped here, no fuck you
They addressed that, actually.
True to the spirit of journalistic inquiry, your correspondent can attest that seawater has not degraded the taste of the bananas, with the only threats to health posed by skin slippage and by eating too many of them.
Im sure they come clean if you wash them vigorously by hand.
The tarantulas have usually abandoned the bananas by the time we eat the bananas.
Usually
…
Sometimes as I’m tearing a banana from the bundle I picture the tarantulas that might’ve been crawling all over it, and I wonder if I’m touching the same spot a hairy tarantula has been. I don’t like having those thoughts. So I try not to have those thoughts.
So you’re saving buying a big load of bananas isn’t a good way to get a new cuddly spider friend? :(
Oh fuck it’s that where tarantulas come from? Bugs are so confusing
I assume the spiders would have died, and now you have delicious, brined cooking bananas!
Wonder what all that banana skin soaked up.
Ocean water that everyone swims in perfectly fine
That delicious plastic and sewage and population. It does a body good.
I don’t want to eat the skin
You won’t have to, the edible part of the banana will absorb the skins content.
But it’s got all the vitamins!
Cocaine
Weird, right? On the one hand - we dont eat banana peels. So, it must be fine, right? But on the other hand, I’d also hesitate to eat a snickers bar washed up on the shore.
I mean if you opened the package and it was dry tho?
Nah, they were dumb enough to lose them, those bananas are fair game.
this reminds me of the famous quote in the grapes of wrath
The works of the roots of the vines, of the trees, must be destroyed to keep up the price, and this is the saddest, bitterest thing of all. Carloads of oranges dumped on the ground. The people came for miles to take the fruit, but this could not be. How would they buy oranges at twenty cents a dozen if they could drive out and pick them up? And men with hoses squirt kerosene on the oranges, and they are angry at the crime, angry at the people who have come to take the fruit. A million people hungry, needing the fruit- and kerosene sprayed over the golden mountains. And the smell of rot fills the country. Burn coffee for fuel in the ships. Burn corn to keep warm, it makes a hot fire. Dump potatoes in the rivers and place guards along the banks to keep the hungry people from fishing them out. Slaughter the pigs and bury them, and let the putrescence drip down into the earth.
There is a crime here that goes beyond denunciation. There is a sorrow here that weeping cannot symbolize. There is a failure here that topples all our success. The fertile earth, the straight tree rows, the sturdy trunks, and the ripe fruit. And children dying of pellagra must die because a profit cannot be taken from an orange. And coroners must fill in the certificate- died of malnutrition- because the food must rot, must be forced to rot. The people come with nets to fish for potatoes in the river, and the guards hold them back; they come in rattling cars to get the dumped oranges, but the kerosene is sprayed. And they stand still and watch the potatoes float by, listen to the screaming pigs being killed in a ditch and covered with quick-lime, watch the mountains of oranges slop down to a putrefying ooze; and in the eyes of the people there is the failure; and in the eyes of the hungry there is a growing wrath. In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage.
I thought of exactly the same thing!
The cargo company should be prosecuted for littering. Unless they can convince some benevolent locals to go help them clean up the spill.
Members of the British government have been calling for strong efforts to ensure the shipping company and its insurers will pay the costs of the cleanup. Seatrade, which operates the vessel, said its insurers are fully engaged in the process, and in the meantime, volunteers are scouring the beaches, aiding in the cleanup (and possibly taking a few bananas home as a reward).
Oh goodie, the insurers are fully engaged! I’m sure they will help clear the quickly rotting food off the beach just as much as the volunteers who are physically there doing actual work.
God I hate pencil-pusher culture, it’s so weird 😂
Thanks for the quote! I realise I replied snarkily - I’m not mad at you of course, just at the quote
its insurers are fully engaged in the process
I am now imagining an insurance office where suddenly an alarm goes off:
The lights turn red, a siren howls, and everyone jumps up from their seats and runs to a garage where black vans are wating with the engines running.
They drive to the beach and frantically start picking up bananas, in a race against time and decomposition.I was thinking some sort of boardroom with a big screen on one wall, showing a beach covered in bananas, with some bald fella, who is unmistakably French, looking on, then waving his hand and saying “Engage.”
But alas instead it’s a board of lawyers that are engaged in a race to find a loophole to get out of this without spending anything cleaning.
In my area there are independent contractors who listen in on their police scanners. When there is a fire or a break in these contractors show up in a van filled with plywood. As soon as the authorities allow them in they seal the building so no one can get inside. When the insurance company rep shows up they are happy to pay off the contractor because sealing the place prevents further damage.
I bet that van often happens to be parked right around the corner when a building catches fire.
Because it’s New York, yes that did happen at least once.
I hope they will sue seagull as well
Fuck the bananas
I want the Cocaine washing up on the shores
Fuck the bananas
No, that’s also illegal.
Is it? Dang can’t fuck shit in the UK.
I honestly feel like cocaine to a large extent is partially responsible for much of the world’s malignant narcissist billionaire evil rulers. And hence, you are not allowed to eat bananas. So maybe the world needs less cocaine, not more.
Naw, we just need equal access to cocaine. Level the playing field with subsidized cocaine I say!
Universal basic coca
Make Coca-Cola Great Again!
Enrich tap water with cocaine
So maybe the world needs less cocaine, not more.
Woh there with your hot take
I prefer the theory of the bourgeois that has to live with his community and therefore has to care compared to wall communities and an apartment in dubai.
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While true (maybe), if I find a brick of coke I’m 100% busting that down into 8balls and getting it gone quick. I know cokeheads suck but I gotta make a buck too and one isn’t that much in the grand scheme of keys.
Tbh we’re just lucky I don’t turn it into an E-40 song before I break it down.
